You've heard people say, "30 is the new 20", right? It really cracks me up when my mom will say something like, "60 is the new 30!" Hahaha...I wouldn't stretch it THAT far, Mom!
So my friend, Michelle called me today. I asked her how she was doing and she said, "Okay". (They're getting ready to buy their first house, so she's a bit stressed!). I said, "Yeah, I'm doing OKAY too." To which she replied, "Oh, that's good!". No, that is NOT good...that's not the response I was looking for!!! I was fishing! I was looking for an "Oh, what's wrong?" so that I could unload emotionally on her...that IS why she had called, is it not? No, it was not.
I got to thinking. Maybe at this season in my life, Okay is the new Great. It's okay to just be okay. I'm not doing HORRIBLY, and most of the time I'd say I'm leaning heavily toward Good, even--with moments of Greatness in between...but I'm definitely chugging along at Okay, and that's, well...OKAY! John 16:33 says, "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." No one promised me that things would be easy...no one TOLD me to have all of these children, or to homeschool or to even CARE that my home is kept. Well, no one other than God Himself...and if HE says that I'll have trouble...I guess I should be content that perhaps this is part of His plan at this moment in my life...that He is working character into me...He's refining me, if you will. Yes, refinement is PAINFUL, it's not "fun", but it's also not BAD! I am one of those people who will kick and kick and fight and fight when I need to learn to just sit back and enjoy the ride. I struggle greatly with this...I have a faith issue! But at this point, I'm finding that the more I kick and fight, the more I sink. It's much like swimming...when you relax and just float, it's easy. When you kick and fight and struggle...well, you drown! I told my husband today that it is frustrating when you pray and you quote scripture, it seems like things should just fall into place...but that's not always what happens. Don't get me wrong, I've had moments where I was truly on the verge of losing it, I cried out to the Lord and he relieved me from my distress (Psalm 107:6). But God is not my "Magic Genie" who comes along and grants my wishes...He takes care of my NEEDS. When I come before him and admit, "Lord, I am weary and heavy-laden...I NEED rest", I have to trust that HE knows what kind of rest I need...and how much of it I need. This is not easy. It's a moment to moment walk of faith. Faith is a fruit and fruit is developed through my submission to the Spirit and allowing the Lord to work out my impurities through this process of refinement...and I've got to learn to be Okay with that.
Here is a song by Ginny Owens that has brought me so much encouragement. She went blind at the age of 2, yet is an amazing musician, so she knows what she's talking about!!